Monday, July 12, 2010

Divorce Would Be Bad Because?

Ever have one of those days when a divorce/break up with your significant other just sounds like bliss?  You'd have the bed all to yourself.  You wouldn't have to clean up after him (as in picking up his dirty laundry that he throws on the ground only 2 feet away from the hamper).  It'd be one less person to cook for, and you'd no longer have to address his likes/dislikes when cooking OR you can get your favorite toppings on pizza when you're too tired to cook. 

Then there's the "my side" of the bedroom and "his side" that would all be yours and CLEAN!




Oh, and then there's the television dispute.  I want to watch shows like Glee, Drop Dead Diva, Grey's Anatomy or The Biggest Loser.  He wants to watch Dirty Jobs (okay, I'll watch that, but not a marathon of 10 in a row, okay?), Junkyard Wars or that stupid show with Chip Foose where they rebuild old cars that I can't think of the name of.  Don't get me wrong, we do watch SOME of the same shows like Bones, Big Bang Theory and NCIS. 

None of this mattered before in my marriage.  Then, my husband became unemployed.  Not just for a couple of days or weeks, or even months, but for over a YEAR now.  Politicians are going to cause my divorce if they don't do something about the economy.  Soon!

You see, we had a system.  He would work, I would clean.  He'd come home from work, we'd eat dinner together and he'd go watch tv in the living room.  I would go to my room and watch my shows that I liked.  Life was good.  

Then...unemployment.  
I'm left with someone home snacking ALL day dirtying more dishes.  COOKING lunches and creating more dishes.  I mean really, I never use that many dishes when I cook!  Then to irritate me make matters worse, in his ultimate boredom state a couple of months ago, he decided to finally look into HAM radios.  OMG!!!  Are you freakin kidding me?  MORE wires laying around the house!  Oh, and scroll back up and look at the picture on his side.  See that?  ....

THAT stupid ass picture hanging up is not a picture at all, its his ham radio license.  Because the FCC states that if you're on the air, you have to have your license in plain view.  Right.  Because the FCC has nothing better to do than drive out to the middle of nowhere in the country to make sure YOU have your license hanging up.  Hey FCC...it's freakin hanging up now? Okay?  Could someone PLEASE come and tell him its okay to put the damn thing in a drawer and stop messing up my decorating.  As if he couldn't hang it up in the garage in HIS territory!!!!  Grrrrrr....

I love my husband.  I love my husband.  I love my husband.

But he better get a job.  SOON!

1 comments:

amanda said...

I would run away from home if Chris were here 24/7 for a month, much less a year.

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